In the News

Not that I have my own news show, but maybe I should. Here's what's on my mind about what's in the news.

1. What's with the news, anyway? I completely boycotted the news while living in Michigan. The local news was the Detroit news, where there is no good news, let me tell you! Was that sentence even coherent? Who can say. I tried watching the news when I moved there, but the stories were all about robbery, rape, murder, child abuse, drive-by shootings, poor people getting evicted, and other such depressing stuff. This morning I was doing some arms and abs (you know, toning) after my cardio workout when I turned on the Today show. Which I promptly had to turn off right after the not-so-compelling coverage of Hurricane Gustav. They were talking about sex addictions, a toddler's murder, and other unsuitable-for-children kind of stuff. Whew! The news in my new hometown is pretty darn tame. An occasional house fire or cat stuck up a tree, too many hippies sleeping under bridges, you know, that kind of stuff. But it's so lame to watch. Guess I'll stick to the internet and radio for my news sources.

2. Speaking of sex addictions, which we kind of were. I read online today that David Duchovny checked himself into rehab for his sex addiction. This does not surprise me at all, since he is the star of a show called "Californication." Really? Did you think you could act like a total slimeball and that the filth would not ooze into your real life? Hmm. I do feel kind of bad for his wife, although she's pretty sure it's just a pornography addiction and not extramarital affairs. Yikes! Some of you with good internet filters might not be able to read this post. Can I just say that I LOATHE TV shows that are all about sex, promote sex gratuitously, and show casual sex way too much. I have never seen David's show, but I can guess what it's all about. I hope the rehab works, by the way. But you might have to consider a new job, Mr. Duchovny. Maybe you should stick to alien investigation.

3. Dear Ms. Bristol Palin,
I am sorry that your very personal and private life is splashed all over every media outlet in the United States of America, and plenty of foreign ones too. It's really no one's business how you got pregnant, why, or what you're going to do now. My main concern for you is that you aren't forced into a marriage you don't want so that your mom saves face with American voters. I value marriage more than that. I would hope that you value yourself enough to think about your options. You're almost a legal adult, and you're clearly engaging in adult behaviors, so don't get pushed around, okay? Of course, you may be deeply in love with your baby's father. If that's the case, I'm sure you two will make it work -- with a lot of hard work. But if not, don't do anything you really don't want to do. You are in a tough position, one I wouldn't wish upon any young girl your age. But I'll bet you're pretty smart, so think things through and do what's best for you and your baby. Even if you don't end up together.

4. A really cute baby elephant was born at the Portland Zoo a week or two ago. I can't wait to see it! Baby elephants are all fuzzy and adorable. Not like hold in your lap adorable, but like 300 pounds of pachyderm adorable.

See, there is good news!

Amy